Originally my book “Woman to Woman” was to be a conversation I want to have with only women. Not much of it originally contained words directed toward our male counterparts. However, I realized that while the main content should be (and is) directed toward my sisters, some male insight added to the conversation could only open up the talk in a more profound way, and give women some much needed insight on what men REALLY think when they feed “lines” to certain women in order to feed their egos when they have gotten to the point where they are seeking to be unfaithful.
I decided to Facebook Message many of the men that show up on my Facebook thread to ask them a series of questions basically called, “What Men REALLY Mean When They Say…” To my delight and surprise, almost all of the men I messaged were happy to help me with this venture! I let them know that I am asking them to break “guy code” for me, thereby giving them the option to be quoted in the book as anonymous, or with their first name published only. Not surprisingly, most of them have chosen the anonymous option, and that is fine with me. The insight they are giving me is sure to get them kicked out of “the club” should their fellow bros find out they gave out such guarded and juicy information.
All of the answers, whether they get used or not, gave me more clarity, and has helped to add more content to my writing – not having enough content to end up with a decent amount of chapters has been my biggest concern. Moreover, it is my sincerest hope that the women who read my book will take what these men have said to heart when considering whether or not to allow themselves to become involved with a man who is already involved with someone else.
I will certainly give the men a shout out in the “Acknowledgements” section of my book, but I want to thank them even now for their input, support, and honesty which puts me one step closer to fulfilling my dream of becoming a successful published Author…thank you gentlemen from the bottom of my heart.
Here is a great section from the book that included answers from my eager cohorts:
Justification #8: “He said, ‘She doesn’t treat him right.’”
With that I can only ask, how do you know that to be the truth? He told you that his wife does not treat him like a man, does not understand him. Let me decode that for you. That means she doesn’t understand why he has stopped communicating, stopped spending time with the family, stopped being affectionate, and stopped trying. It’s not that she “doesn’t treat him right”; more than likely, as it was in my case, she is more than likely catering to his every need at this time because she can sense the distance. Not treating him right is code for, “she will not let me do whatever I want.” He told you all his wife does is nag him. That means that his wife asks him questions she deserves answers to, like, why are you working so late all of a sudden? What is going on with you? What is happening to us? Where were you last night? What did you spend that money on? Why are you hiding your phone? That is not nagging. That is a wife who knows there is a problem in the marriage, and that talking to each other is the only way to begin to fix it. Also, if he feels his wife isn’t treating him right, he’s a grown man…he can always just leave.
Sylvester via FB Messenger said: Most times men [say this] just to get between a woman’s legs; and to gain pity from the lady he is wooing.
Anonymous via FB Messenger said: Sounds like he wants his cake, but likes different frosting! Sounds like a cowardly excuse to cheat on his partner. Maybe he is not being “treated right” because he has no respect for his partner.
Mark via Facebook Messenger said: Almost all guys trying to cheat have one thing on their mind…SEX, and will say whatever they think they need to get it.
Anonymous via Facebook Messenger said: He is using that as a way to let the other woman know he likes to be spoiled, and get his way.
Anonymous via Facebook Messenger said: More often than not the guy is just trying to get laid without leaving his wife.
Kerry via Facebook Messenger said: He straight up wants to cheat because the other woman is available.
James via Facebook Messenger said: He is saying that he wants to have sex with the non-wife, and is attempting to provide [her] with a reason for her to go with it.
Be sure to get your copy of “Woman to Woman” so you can read all of the juicy insight these great guys give. While it is serious, their involvement added a bit of light-heartedness to a very intense subject.
I truly hope you have enjoyed this weeks post. I welcome your respectful comments on this, or any other post. In fact, I would love to have your input. Leave your comments, and if you have enjoyed this post, please also subscribe to my once-a-week post in the appropriate section. Thank you all for your generous support.