I am sure many of us experienced a wave of emotions as TL shared her rawest, and most personal emotions as she found out from a mistress, that her husband of 22-years may have been having an affair.\u00a0 Here now is the conclusion of interview with a scorned wife.\u00a0 We will pick up where TL was pulling herself together so she could get ready to confront her husband, and find out the truth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
TL: When I got up off the floor, I went to\nthe bathroom to rinse my face. I felt\nrelief for the moment realizing that all of what she said could be a complete\nlie. My head and heart were in total\nconflict with each other. My heart\nbelieved it was true, my head was being more rational. While I was drying my face, I heard the\ngarage door open. I almost fainted. My heart fell in my stomach. I didn\u2019t know how I was even going to broach\nthe subject. I didn\u2019t even know how to\napproach him. Our norm was a kiss and a\nhug anytime one of us returned home. I\nremember looking in the mirror, and telling myself\u2026\u201djust don\u2019t lose it before\nyou even get the question out.\u201d I turned\noff the light, looked at myself in the mirror again, and headed back to the\nliving room. I remember shaking all\nover, and feeling like I wanted to throw up.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Because I had question\u2019s I didn\u2019t really\nwant the answers to.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Yeap, many\nof us know that feeling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: \nMy last thought before I saw him was, \u2018am I going to end my marriage if\nhe tells me it\u2019s true?\u2019 I saw him, he\ncame toward me to kiss and hug me, and I just collapsed into his arms. He hugged me so tightly. Now looking back on that moment, it was\nalmost as if he knew that I knew and didn\u2019t want to let me go, \u2018cause that hug\njust went on and on.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: How did you feel being in his arms at that\nmoment?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Safe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Interesting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Yeah it is. The same person that was already unraveling\nmy self-confidence, was also making me feel whole in that moment. I didn\u2019t want the hug to end. I didn\u2019t want to have to ask him the question.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: So did\nyou?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I had to. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: So, how\ndid you go from a loving embrace to asking him a question that could be the end\nof your marriage?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I looked up at him and just asked\u2026is it\ntrue? After that I collapsed to the\nfloor again. I had no strength.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: What did he do?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: He fell to his knees and started to\ncry. He just looked down at the\nfloor. He couldn\u2019t even look at me. I just knew it was true. We just held each other and cried. He kept saying how sorry he was, and that he\ndidn\u2019t want to lose me. I remember that\nfor some reason his words should have made me feel better, they actually made\nme angrier. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Because if he didn\u2019t want to lose you, then\nwhy would he risk it all by having an affair right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Exactly. I looked at him and basically asked that very\nquestion, and at first he said he didn\u2019t know why. I told him that was an unacceptable answer,\nand he better start talking or he could just pack his s*** and go right\nthen. We got up off the floor and sat on\nthe couch. He just said he had been\nfeeling low, and she made him feel good about himself. I asked him why he didn\u2019t talk to me about\nhow he was feeling, and he said he didn\u2019t want me to think it had anything to\ndo with me, or our marriage. I said, how\ndo you think I feel now that I know you chose to bed some whore, rather than\njust tell me what you were going through. \nHe said he hadn\u2019t really thought about it that way. He said he just started talking to her at\nwork, and one thing led to another. I\ntold him that this was not a f***ing movie, and one thing doesn\u2019t just lead to\nanother, that there had to be planning when you\u2019re going to f*** another woman.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Good for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I told him he better tell me everything\nI want to know or else. So, he said that\nshe was easy to talk to, and she was very sympathetic to how he felt at the\ntime. I asked him how exactly he was\nfeeling, and he said he had been feeling lonely, unattractive, and questioning\nwhether or not he wanted to stay married. \nThat last part took my breath away because I had no idea he was\nquestioning our marriage.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: You two weren\u2019t having any marital strain at\nthe time?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I mean, both our kids were finally out\nof the house, so there were some awkward moments where we found ourselves only\ntalking about when the kids were home. I\nguess it was odd trying to find more things in common with each other than just\nour children. But I didn\u2019t see that as anything\nserious. Definitely not to the point of\nthinking we didn\u2019t belong together anymore.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Wow, so that \u201cempty-nest syndrome\u201d can really\nimpact a relationship more than most of us would know. I don\u2019t have any children so I don\u2019t have any\nexperience with that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I had heard about that, but it just\nseemed like we needed to adjust, not full on re-examine our marriage.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Well of course not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I asked him how long he had been seeing\nher, and he said for a few months. I\nasked him when, because he was always home at around his normal time, and he\nsaid they would meet during lunch breaks. \nI asked him if he had sex with that woman in the car that we both drive,\nand he said yes. I was absolutely\ndisgusted. I asked him didn\u2019t he feel\ndirty having sex in a car, in our<\/em> car, and he said he didn\u2019t think about\nit. I asked him if he was in love with\nher, and he said no. I asked him if he\nloved her, and he said no. He asked me\nhow I found out, and I told him that the b**** called and told me. He said he was sorry that I found out that\nway. I asked him if we would have told\nme if she didn\u2019t, and he said yes. He\nsaid he planned on telling me today. I\nsaid, oh yeah, were you thinking about how to tell me today while you were in\nher shower you f***ing a**hole? He just\nlooked down. I got up and walked away.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Because in that moment I realized that\nhe hadn\u2019t too long left her house after having sex with her, and I was\ncompletely disgusted. He got up to\nfollow me, and I screamed at him to not follow me. He had the nerve to say that we needed to\ntalk about this. I turned around, and\nthe look on my face must have told him exactly how I was feeling because he\nbacked off.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Do you remember what \u201cface\u201d you made?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I can only say that it was a mix of\ninfuriation and \u201care you f***ing kidding me?\u201d \nThe time to talk was BEFORE you stuck your d*** in another woman!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: That\u2019ll do it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n (We both laugh)<\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: So, what did you do after that initial talk\nwith him?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Surprisingly I had stopped crying. I went into the kitchen to make us dinner.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: That\u2019s interesting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I guess, but I just needed a moment of\nrelief, a moment of what I knew to be normal between us, and cooking is\nsomething I love to do for my family.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Did you eat dinner with him?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Yeap<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: What\nwas that like?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Believe it or not, it was normal. I mean, we didn\u2019t talk much. Little things were said like this is really\ngood, thank you, do you want seconds? \nLittle stuff like that.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: What happened after dinner?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I went in the bedroom while he cleaned\nthe kitchen. It has never taken him so\nlong to wash the dishes before. I\u2019m sure\nhe didn\u2019t know whether he should try and talk to me some more, or just leave me\nalone.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: What did you want at that moment?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I was ready to talk some more.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: What\nelse did you want to know?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Well, what was bothering me the most\nwas how I missed the signs if he was dealing with what sounded like\ndepression. I wanted. No, I needed to know why he really didn\u2019t\ntalk to me about it. We had never kept\nanything from each other before. We\ntalked about everything, even if it meant some hurt feelings, so why was this\nany different.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Did you\nbelieve his reasoning for why he didn\u2019t talk to you, and that that\u2019s what led\nto him being unfaithful?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Some part of me needed to believe\nhim. It was better than him telling me\nhe just didn\u2019t love me anymore.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: I get that. \nSo, what have you decided to do?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Well, he is still at home. I truly haven\u2019t made a decision either\nway. Some days I think I am Wonder Woman\nand I feel like I don\u2019t deserve this, and I can kick him out, and I will be\njust fine without him. Other days, I\nrealize I am still very much in love with my husband, and I ask myself is this indiscretion\nworth letting go of over 2 decades of a happy marriage. What did you do?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: I felt the exact same way. Moments of unbelievable emotional\nstrength. Telling myself I could do\nbetter, and I deserved better. To\nballing uncontrollably at the thought of not being married anymore. I NEVER wanted a divorce. I was in it for sickness and in health,\nbetter or worse. Even through him having\na baby with her, I was willing to work it out if he would have me. I held on to a sad fantasy where he got\neverything he wanted, while I settled for what he gave me. As hard as it was for me, I ultimately ended\nup divorcing him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: So do you think I should leave?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: I would NEVER presume to tell anyone what they\nshould do in their marriage. I will also\nnever judge what people decide to do about their marriage. You have to decide by yourself if this is not\nonly forgivable, but also something you can truly move past and allow him to\nre-earn your trust. I do know that\ncouples who stay together after unfaithfulness, but who continue to bring up\nthe affair, end up divorcing; not because of the affair itself, but because of\nthe inability to move past the affair, and really give the spouse the chance to\nprove their re-devotion. So, my only\nadvice is to take as much time as you need, and make a decision that centers\naround YOUR happiness, and your happiness alone. <\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Thank you. I appreciate that. I\u2019ll let you know what I decide.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: And\nalways feel free to reach out to me if you need someone who understands to talk\nwith. <\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Thank you.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: You\u2019re\nwelcome. So, I only have a couple of\nother questions if that\u2019s ok.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Sure<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: How do\nyou feel about Catherine?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: I f***ing hate her!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Wow, you didn\u2019t hesitate to answer that! Why such animosity towards a woman who\ndoesn\u2019t know you, and you don\u2019t know her?<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Because she\u2019s a woman, and she knew he\nwas married. I am sure she\u2019s experienced\nbetrayal at some point in her life, so for her to do this to another woman makes\nmy blood boil.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: I\ncompletely get that. But why don\u2019t you\nseem to feel that same depth of resentment towards your husband.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: \nOh I do, but he is <\/em>my husband, and he and I both vowed to stay\ntogether for better or for worse, like you said. Because we took those vows before God, I feel\nmore able to forgive him than I do her. \nFor women to be willing to betray other women this way just feels so\nwrong. I don\u2019t know how to explain it\nfully, I\u2019m sure you do a great job of it in your book.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: It is\nhard to explain. I just know that you\nand I are absolutely not alone in our feelings towards mistresses. I do feel that I\u2019ve done a good job of\nexplaining it in the book. It has a lot\nto do with the simple fact that we women have a bond simply because we are\nwomen. We have a cathartic connection,\nan unspeakable bond that is supposed to include protecting each other\u2019s hearts. We don\u2019t seem to care to want to do that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Exactly. See, I knew you would be able to explain it.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: Well\nTL, this is the end of the interview. \nAnything else you would like to add.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: Not really. Maybe just that I hope that women will really\nopen their eyes after reading this, and after reading your book, and come\ntogether. We are better than this.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n LeTisha: I 100% agree. \nThank you from the bottom of my heart for being so willing to share your\nstory with us. I hope that whatever\ndecision you make leads you back to genuine joy. We\u2019ll talk again soon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n TL: \nYes we will, and you are very welcome.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Thank you loyal readers. I hope you enjoyed this week\u2019s post. I definitely invite your respectful comments,\nand feedback. If you like what you\u2019ve\nread here, or in any of my other posts, please subscribe. Thank you for your support.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I am sure many of us experienced a wave of emotions as TL shared her rawest, and most personal emotions as she found out from a mistress, that her husband of 22-years may have been having an affair.\u00a0 Here now is the conclusion of interview with a scorned wife.\u00a0 We will pick up where TL […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":392,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[6,11,42,48,54,84,86,96,114,131,132,141,166,167,171],"class_list":["post-391","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-adultery","tag-author","tag-divorce","tag-family","tag-females","tag-infidelity","tag-interviews","tag-marriage","tag-newbook","tag-relationships","tag-religion","tag-sexuality","tag-wives","tag-women","tag-writer"],"featured_image_src":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/sadwife.jpg","featured_image_src_square":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/sadwife.jpg","author_info":{"display_name":"LeTisha Jackson","author_link":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/?author=3"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/391","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=391"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/391\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/392"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=391"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=391"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/letishajackson.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=391"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}