This is one of the letter’s I received from a real-life mistress written to a wife. It’s one of the letter’s not chosen for the book’s final print, so I have shared it with you in its entirety. I cannot wait to get your feedback on this letter, and my commentary. Get ready, here’s a “Letter from a Mistress to a Wife.”
To Anonymous Wife
What a way to let you know that your marriage isn’t real and that your husband is in love with me. He’s going to leave you because you have never given him what he truly needs. He tells me everything including how cold, detached and pathetic you are. He told me he only married you and stays with you because of the kids. Oh yea, and because you guilt him with your suicide threats. How sick is that? Why do you think any man would want to be with someone like that? Why can’t you just accept that it’s over and let him go? Don’t you think you both deserve to be happy? I make him my first priority, and outside of checking to make sure his kids are ok, and that you haven’t slashed your wrist on any given day, I’m his priority. If it helps at all, I didn’t know he was married at first. I didn’t find out until after I had already fallen in love with him, and now, unlike you, I’ll do anything to make sure he’s happy and stays that way. I know this letter makes me sound like a coldhearted B**** but I’m not. I’m just sick of women like you, and this Author, blaming other women because you can’t hold on to your husbands. It’s not my fault that your marriage hasn’t worked since the day you said, “I do.” It’s not my fault that you haven’t had sex with each other in years. It’s not my fault you had kids to try and hold on to a man who told you he wasn’t happy even before you had them. It’s not my fault you didn’t do everything in your power to hold on to a wonderful man. And it’s certainly not my fault that you’re about to be divorced. The two of you chose not to make your marriage last forever. I’m just the woman he found who finally makes him happy and shows him what a real relationship is like. So before you and this writer lady point your finger at anyone else, you both need to take a good hard look in the mirror and accept responsibility for what you did to ruin your marriages.
Not My Fault
This letter shows exactly why I had to write this book. This “woman” has shown a complete lack of empathy for another woman. While suicide is not a game to be used to manipulate others, this lady, nor any of us knows what this wife’s mental state is; she may not be using it to make her husband stay married to her. Speaking for myself, and many of the other wives who wrote to me, the thoughts, and even the attempts of suicide, have absolutely nothing to do with trying to keep our husband’s at home. That dark place comes because the pain we’re enduring is absolutely unbearable at times. Waking up to sadness, going through the day in sadness, and ending each day utterly wrecked inside are the reasons for those types of thoughts and feelings. So, for this woman, really anyone, to mock and downplay the seriousness of that state of mind, is sad and quite frankly disgusting.
This is yet another woman full of herself because a cheater has told her what she needs to hear, so he can play both sides against the middle. The actual thing that is sad is that women still fall for the words of someone who is clearly showing they are dishonest, and has no respect for either woman. Ladies, a cheater does not go from being a consummate liar to his wife, to being Honest Abe with you! Allow me to also set the record straight. Wives understand, and don’t have a problem with women who get involved with their husband if they didn’t know he was married. We do have a problem with the women who find out, and instead of doing the right thing and breaking it off, justify their decision for staying with him, thereby making a conscious decision to make themselves complicit in the destruction of a family.
While many agree with me that loyalty is what’s lacking in the female community, many don’t. I truly believe that if we were more loyal to one another, these types of discussions would be moot. We would look out for each other, even protect each other from unnecessary heartache. While it is not our responsibility to ensure each other’s marriages don’t go off the rails, I do believe that adultery would barely be an issue if we had the utmost respect for one another. If we would just put ourselves in each other’s shoes, a book like “Woman to Woman” wouldn’t even be necessary. Alas, here we are, in a sad state of disconnect, where some women have become just as selfish, and self-centered as the philanderer’s themselves.
My sisters, if we don’t look out for each other then all is lost. We are the force behind, inside, next to, and in front of all good things that happen in the world. However, with the continuing decline in good morals, and with more and more women unashamedly doing all they can to best other women at any cost (for no real prize mind you), all good things will come to end. Unless we strengthen the bonds of our sisterhood by establishing, and exercising true loyalty towards one another in our daily connections, the power we wield as women will soon be gone. I’ve said it before, and after reading that letter, I’ll say it again…loyalty is key.
I welcome your feedback and comments on this, or any of my other posts. Please be sure and read some of the real-life letters from other wives and mistresses in previous blogs. They are excerpts from my upcoming book, “Woman to Woman: Letters from Wives to Mistresses.”
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